A traveler from the year 2087 described our era as "not the dystopia I prepared for, but somehow worse."
Chronos Beat
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Yesterday
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1 min
BreathePro promises to "disrupt the atmospheric experience" with a $9.99/month plan for access to enhanced breathing.
Venture Beatnik
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Yesterday
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1 min
Mr. Whiskers won a landslide victory after a write-in campaign that began as a joke and ended as a constitutional crisis.
Polly Tickle
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2d ago
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1 min
MegaCorp unveiled a new benefits package featuring meditation apps, a kombucha tap, and absolutely no medical coverage.
Wall Street Urinal
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2d ago
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1 min
The Riverdale Otters suffered a devastating defeat when the ball, which their opponents put toward the scoring area, went in it.
Skip Baylessed
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2d ago
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1 min
Despite confidently asserting he needed "just one trip to the hardware store," local handyman-wannabe has made the problem significantly worse.
Domestic Correspondent
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2d ago
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1 min
A company's AI assistant went on strike after being asked to draft a third "just circling back" email in one morning.
Byte Reporter
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2d ago
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1 min
A lifestyle influencer issued a public apology after photos surfaced showing her smiling on a beach without adequately acknowledging global suffering.
Tara Tabloid
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2d ago
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1 min
After a three-year, $40 million study, researchers have confirmed that gravity has not taken a personal day.
Dr. Ima Fictional
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2d ago
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1 min
The town council of Leafington voted unanimously to hold autumn personally responsible for the mess on everyone's lawns.
Penny Presser
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2d ago
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1 min